Sunday, November 30, 2008

27. Nanowrimo 2008

So, I only got to 10687 words, which is of course even worse than last year... ah well. I still haven't figured out what happens in the last half of this story.
I titled the story Quiet the Voices. Here's a summary (although what I've written for the story doesn't quite match what I wrote for the summary, it gives you an idea of where the story was going.)
--- Almichaeli's college professor and mentor has come to him with a problem. In his research to destroy the segregation between those with 'voices' and those without, he has removed the 'voices' from his own mind. Mike attempts to keep Bob from slipping into the typical (non-voice) depression and drugs while he and Tasha attempt to continue Bob's research, despite being watched by the government.

And here are two of my better scenes (one is currently at the beginning, the other about halfway through.):

It was cold that night, Tasha had walked the four blocks to work like normal and now she was wishing she had not. Home might be close, just around the corner, but her thin brown jacket did not keep the wind from getting under her skin.
"Hey, Tasha!"
She stopped, startled, and turned to face the voice. Her neighbor, Sid, sat in his fancy black car with his fancy black suit and pulled his fancy black briefcase off of the seat beside him.
"Here, let me give you a ride. You look like you are about to be blown back to where you started."
"Thanks!" She shivered.Her reliable white nurse shoes crunched over the leaves as she stepped off the curb and walked around.
"I cannot believe how fast fall is flying by. This jacket is not near heavy enough."
"Do you really think it is safe to be walking this late at night?"
"Well…"
"I mean, I assume you may have chosen this neighborhood, like I did, for it is safety record, however, a young woman such as yourself really should not walk alone after dark. That is my view in any case." He smiled kindly, indicating he was not considering her dumb for doing what he would not advise. His shiny white teeth annoyed her however. Sid was just too polished.
"I agree really. One day you have plenty of time to get home before it is too dark and the next it was too dark hours ago. I need to start driving. It is such a waste of gas for such a short distance."
~*~
"Dr. McGee."
"Ms. Ralt."
"What brings you here today? Another conspiracy theory?"
Idan bit his tongue. He had once tried to tell Ms. Ralt a story, when he was really nervous and not thinking clearly obviously. This had backfired into the closest thing to a joke Ms. Ralt ever said. The story was meant to be funny, playing on the fact that in this job it was rather plain to see that most conspiracy theories were based on truth.
"Not today Ms. Ralt. Today I have information on a couple people losing their voices, and the fact that one does not seem to be affected."
"That's nonsense!"
"You remember Sidney Burnell."
"Ah yes, the idiot that cannot drive. It is such a waste of money to fix such people. Why cannot they just crash and die?" She paused. "So, it cannot be him. There would be no need to fix him if he were not affected."
"No... it is his neighbor who was in the car with him at the time."
"Wait, let me look this up in his records.
"Ms. Ralt snapped her fingers outside her door and a small squinty-eyed man rushed over from his cubicle.
"I need the employee record for Mr. Sidney Burnell. Yesterday."
"Yes Ms. Ralt." Away he rushed.
"Dr. McGee." She turned back his direction and inwardly he cringed. "How did you come across this information?"
"Mr. Burnell called me a few months ago and told me he was having a few problems adjusting still, and felt there was things that he needed to talk over with someone. I did inform him that if I felt he had something to discuss he would rather the government not know, he should not come to me because I was required to pass the information on. He did not feel it would be an issue. I'm not sure why he felt that, because I do feel slightly uncomfortable with passing this information on."
"But you believe it to be important?"
"Yes, I do. The reason I find it more important has to do with a report from the mental hospital. This same neighbor has changed jobs to this facility, especially to care for a Dr. Robert Gibbs, Professor of Psychology at the state university. Have you read of him recently?"
Ms. Ralt pursed her lips. "No, should I have?"
"I think you would find it pertinant to the information I just passed on."
"All right. I suppose after I have refreshed my memory on these two men I will call you to explain in further detail why this is important to me."
"Good. I will be ready."
"Dismissed."
Idan quickly left the office, and leaned against the wall. His heart had been beating much too hard and it was a great relief to be out of there, even if just for a short while. He hoped he had made the right decision... but it was too late now if it was not.
~*~

1 comment:

  1. Jil, you've been tagged.

    http://bondchristian.com/seven-random-weird-facts-about-marshall-and-others/

    Check it out...

    Marshall

    ReplyDelete